Do you ever have those days where you just feel a lot more stressed than usual? I am sure you have. Well, today is one of those days for me! It isn’t that I have a lot of work to do. I just have a lot of work to do. The work isn’t due for another two weeks but I am thinking about it all at once. I do this very often! I shouldn’t because it isn’t as serious as I’m making it but I’m freaking out. I want to scream so loud! This is the last month of my first semester of college and I really want to do well and so I feel like I’m putting a lot of pressure on myself to well. Maybe too much pressure but if I don’t I won’t think I will not get anything done.

I feel like on the days when I am feeling especially stressed I get really annoyed with everything and everyone. I usually take it out on my best friend. He really hates it but he takes it and tells me to stop being crazy. I am really grateful for him for being so easy on me. Today I had to pay my key replacement fee. It should not have been as difficult as it was but I believe that was the climax of my stress! I had an access loan that did not go through and it was showing on my account so I was unable to pay the fee. The people at the bursary office told me to call the financial aid office and I really don’t like that. I called the financial aid office to talk about the access loan that did not go through and the lady on the other side of the phone must have been having a bad day too. She was so rude. I wasn’t being rude, I was just trying to get my stuff together and she was really giving it to me! I reacted in a polite way and just explained to her the situation but she was making me feel like I didn’t know what I was talking about when I definitely knew what I was talking about. I never got a direct solution to my problem by the way. I don’t understand why people  who answer the phone, get so angry. For one, you are here to help me so just do your job and we can get this over with. And two, please trust me when I say I don’t want to be talking to you either. I would not have called if I didn’t need your help.

I’m really just complaining about things but writing makes it so easy. I was feeling okay before this happened and I’m sure the rest of my day will be just fine but right now I am feeling super frustrated. One other thing that has been really stressing me out lately is social media. I have friends that will send me links to things or certain posts and when I am trying to get things done they all come in at once. I don’t really mind it that much but when I feel frustrated it’s too much. I know I could just turn my phone off or mute my notifications but I don’t want to have to do that because it isn’t that serious.

I am a really nice person who likes to do nice things so I hold the doors for people around school. No one says thank you around here, like I am taking time out of my very busy and stressful day to hold the door for you and you walk right past me,say absolutely nothing, and give me a dirty look.

This day wasn’t all crappy. I got a package from my dad and it included spandex. I have really been needing some because it is very hot and windy in the town where my college is and I wear a lot of dresses. They aren’t really that short but if the wind picks up, my dress flies with it. I just so happen to be wearing a dress today and so I slipped on the handy dandy spandex and kept it pushing. I honestly tend to look for the good in every situation, most times it works but I get myself so worked up. I am going to try to find the good in this situation though. Maybe my frustration with school is a mini wakeup call to get my, for lack of better words, shit together.(sorry mom and dad) I don’t like to wallow in self pity because ugh how gross. It just makes me feel bad. So, I will say, I will have a better day tomorrow and have that be the end of it. That is all for now. Remember to be happy.

Zaria 🙂



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