To my best friend who is no longer my best friend

Hi.

It’s been too long.

I miss you a whole lot.

As you age, you will get those friends who are permanent and you will get those not so permanent friends. Sadly, you ended up being not so permanent for reasons that make sense, but it took me so long to fully realize that we would never be the way we were before. So long to realize that we really had drifted apart. This tore me up inside. You were the one best friend I expected to be around forever.  I just hate that word, forever. It gives you some sort of false hope that things will remain a constant in your life. And maybe we will drift back into each other’s lives but I just don’t see it. I used to joke about how I stole you from your old best friend. Then it happened to me and I could no longer joke.

Throughout all of my high school years, with an exception of my senior year, you were there. You were there through all the hardships and all the laughter. You were there to be that reminder that I was being stupid and making stupid decisions. You would listen to my complaining and then give me advice that I didn’t always agree with, but I always listened. I appreciated having you there.

Things don’t always go the way we plan and I would like to say it’s for the better but losing you was one of the greatest losses I had ever experienced. No one would have ever expected it to go this way, but it’s okay. You were and still are one of the most genuine, kind, and selfless people I know. Thank you for being you.

I just want to say I’m sorry. I’m sorry that we grew apart. Even though I took it very hard, I saw it coming. We both did. I feel like it was my fault because I kind of pushed you away. After you left, I stopped prioritizing our friendship because I knew it would be too hard. I stopped putting in that extra 10% to call or to text. But so did you. I know you were busy but people make time for what they want and the sooner I realized it the quicker I learned that it just wasn’t worth it.

You were, by far, the best part of my past. I will look back on our friendship and hope that one day my kids will have a friendship as special as ours.

Our memories used to hurt, but now I enjoy going through the pictures. You are such an amazing person and I honestly wish you the best in whatever you do. I know that you are going to accomplish some big things and that your life will be nothing short of spectacular.

I feel like I can’t even call you my ex-best friend because it just doesn’t feel right. Our friendship didn’t end in a fight, we just drifted. I still text and call you sometimes and I often don’t get a reply but I have come to terms with it. I will always be your friend though and I want you to know that no matter how much time passes I will always be there for you.

I may not understand your quirky gestures or be the person you tell everything to anymore but that it okay. I had my time as your best friend and now someone else will be blessed with the sunshine that comes with you. You have impacted my life in such a positive way and I am forever grateful to have known you.

Thank you for the memories. Thank you for the crazy pictures. Thank you for being my shoulder to cry on. Thank you for giving me a second family. Thank you for the endless laughs. And thank you for being my best friend. Remember to be happy.

With all my love,

Zaria 🙂

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