About being a woman

I have noticed so many things lately in the news and media about women and how we are treated and looked at in this society. This isn’t true for every guy but there are some guys who believe women are only pieces of meat that belong in the kitchen. This is not true at all. I really hate that we are perceived in that way. I am so much more than a piece of meat and a housewife. I wanted to share with you all a few of the things I have noticed about being a woman.

I guess I will start out with the “locker room banter”. This has been the new thing that excuses guys from talking about women in a demeaning way. I’m definitely not going for it. I do not think this excuses them from being nasty. Donald Trump said “grab them by the p—y”. He was talking about women, saying they let you do whatever you want. I would never want a guy to think that grabbing me anywhere is okay just because they want to. I have little cousins and god sisters who will grow up in a world where men think it’s okay to do whatever they want to them, without consent. I don’t think that is okay. Not every guy is like that, I know, but the fact that the future president of the United States says that it is okay is really troubling to me.

Bossy. Angry. Mean. Hard. Too smart for a girl. I’ve been called all these things and just because I’m a girl does that mean that I am not allowed to be intelligent and hard and know what I want for myself? I don’t think so, but this society seems to think that just because I’m a girl I need to “sit pretty” and let the world happen around me. I am hard and I know that I have to be hard in order for people to take me seriously and it shouldn’t be this way. And heck yeah I’m bossy, I know what I want and I will not settle for less. I am also smart and I’m not too smart for a girl, I’m just smart. I have no problem saying this because not many people can. In high school, most of my classes were on-level classes but I did have the occasional honors or advanced placement class that consisted of mostly white people. The guys in the classes would often get angry because they knew just as well as I did that I was smarter than them. In the beginning, this was a struggle for me because I didn’t necessarily like for people to not like me. I thought that I should try to tone it down and “sit pretty” like they wanted me to. This caused me to lack in participation in class and leave those kind of classes all together. My grades were still good I just didn’t let anyone know. Even in my on-level classes I had this problem. I remember distinctly, my junior year of high school in my literature class. The teacher would assign us vocabulary words and at the end of the week we would have a competition of who knew the words better, the guys or the girls. And of course, the girls won every week. I knew every definition and I was spitting them out faster than the guys could think about the word. Their jealousy and anger was made very clear in the remarks and gestures. I thought it was really funny! But I guess what I’m trying to say is don’t be afraid to be. Be bossy, be smart, be angry and be hard. You have every right to be absolutely anything you want to be! People are going to judge you anyways so you might as well be what you want to be. Another thing I have been told that I should be is ‘sexy’. I don’t have to be cute or pretty or sexy or anything for you. I am cute and pretty and sexy for myself. I do things for myself and I don’t need anyone’s input of what I should be.

On that note, I think I will touch on one last thing. That being a woman is hard. Society expects so much from you and you have to be this and you have to be that and I’m sick and tired of it. While it is hard it is so rewarding; it’s not all bad. There are so many good things about being a woman. I can be countless things; beautiful and smart and gentle and strong all at the same time. I love it. Women are so powerful! Women bring life into this world and do so in the most graceful way. All in all, I am immensely grateful to be a woman. I was on YouTube of course and watched this video of a spoken word poem by a girl who went to my high school. It’s called Lady Like and her name is Meghan Hughes. If you have any free time, go watch it. It’s really good and was my inspiration for this blog post. And as always, remember to be happy.

Zaria 🙂

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